One of my best buds, Joe Gaffney, eloped-ish in Peru. Basically, he gave us three days notice that he would be getting married while on vacation in Peru. So, I nominated myself as best man and put this diddy together and emailed it to the wedding party.
Joe & Meg,
Is this considered eloping? I was really hoping for a save the date magnet and a huge wedding with Burton and Yeti dressed up in some sort of floral patterned outfits and Pip as the ring bearer. Maybe you can dress big Joe up in a nice floral outfit instead.
Weddings are typically a good time for friends and family to give a ‘verbal hug’ through a nice speech. So I tried to put a few kind words together for you two.
Joe, you already know it… you are one of my best friends and I wouldn’t be the person that I am today without you. I could list off the things we’ve done together and the places that we’ve been to (Philly, Switzy, NZ, Wyoming, Hawaii, Utah, Cali, Mexico, etc.), but the bottom-line is that the experiences that we have had together, have been some of the best things to happen to us. It has been great to see you grow up from the a-typical fraternity boy at Villanova to an outdoorsman, professional, and activist.
Meg, you are gonna have your hands full. Are you sure that you want to do this? You’re gonna have to wake up next to this grey haired man, who snores, and has the smelliest feet in the world for the rest of your life. Those toes breed a putrid odour, especially after a day of skiing. There is a reason why we made Joe sleep in a garage for our summer in the “Double-Wide.” Good luck with that.
As you can tell, it is a little hard for me to realize that one of my “boyz” is getting married. As the typically single guy, I tend to always be critiquing girls and describing the perfect girl. “She was too this, the right girl would be more that.” A few weeks ago, Joe and I were driving in Morpheus (Joe’s veggie powered VW bus) talking about love and ladies. I spouted off a list… “She has to be compassionate to the world, smart, funny and a super hottie. The perfect girl is challenging, someone that makes you better with every day. She will keep you on your toes and push you to be your best.” Like most conversations with me, I continued to rant for a while. There is usually a short pause and then I ask the other person a question, “What about you?” And Joe said, “Everything that you said just now, I have in Meg. I am in love.” 5 years ago, I probably would have just started laughing. But I knew it was legitimate.
We are proud and very very happy for you both. Meg, you are certainly a wonderful woman with an insurmountable amount of qualities…you are the ‘perfect girl.’ Joe, you have officially met your match. Love it and cherish her. Who would have thought that a dog park rendezvous in Seattle could spawn such a thing?
Meg never actually met Koda. Koda was Burton’s sidekick for the Wyoming / NYC / California years. He was adopted into our dysfunctional family in Jackson during our first Fall. Koda would always talk, like most huskies can. He never really barked, he would howl and essentially talk back to you. One day our roommate Ashley started talking to him and he would repeat her words. Ashley: “Ouuwwwwww,” Koda: “Ouuwwwww.” Eventually, she taught Koda to say “I love you” or “Ayyy Rove Rue.” We would say “I love you… I love you” and he would reply “Ayyy Rove Rue.”
So, during this wedding ceremony, do me a favour and gaze deeply into each other’s eyes and say “Ayyy Rove Rue.” We are all pumped for you, we wish we could be there, and we wish you two the best together.
Brian